I've quickly learned that the #1 person I need to be concerned about in my professional life is me. Coworkers, family, friends: they all have to come second. Or at least 1b to my 1a. This is not because I am cold or heartless, but because I've realized that the only person really looking out for you is you.
I've sort of known this all along, but probably never wanted to accept it. I guess the bright side is that if you do focus on taking care of yourself, when you are stable, you can afford to focus more attention on others.
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I used to think that I had to look out for me... #1 before anyone else. I'm not sure of the context in which you're making this distinction, but let's do a quick thought experiment.
Imagine you're alone in the world with no other people. What is the meaning of your life? Does it matter if you live or die? Do your actions matter? How is your life evaluated?
Now, do other peoples happiness matter to you? Do friendships give your life meaning? Do others matter? Of course... but do they matter more than you?
In "The Wizard of Oz" I believe it's the wizard who said, "Love can't be measured by what you feel for others, but what others feel about you."
Again, I'm not sure of the context in which you've realized this "cold, hard reality", but by its tone, I strongly feel a false truth, interwoven with many strong truths, has been accepted...
Hopefully, this response will prompt a strong reconsideration.
The context of this post was about my employment status. I work for Northwest, and there's a lot of uncertainty in working for that company right now. So, the post was a little more narrow-scope than I think you interpreted. ;)
Of course, in general though, I still believe that the only person I truly have to answer to is myself, and by "taking care of myself", I'll be able to "look myself in the mirror" and all that.
In reality, the focus between myself and others being #1 shifts pretty regularly. But I guess what I was getting at is that when there's a crunch, I need to realize that there are times I need to be the #1 focus, even if only for a short period of time.
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